Exposing Faults: How They've Made You Better
Everybody in the world has their own problems and faults that they have to deal with on a day to day basis. While I can say this and everyone would agree with the statement immediately, if I would go on to ask someone what their own unique individual problems and curses were, these individuals may have a more difficult time of identifying and presenting what negative characteristics they possess to me.
All people want to be remembered for all of their positive attributes or contributions that they’ve made, so it is no surprise that people will often attempt to conceal their own shortcomings when around other people to present themselves as better than they are. I have my own issues that I struggle with; I’ll be the first to admit this fact.
Although I want to be remembered for all of the good qualities that I’ve shown I possess in high school, I honestly feel that my drawbacks are the most important qualities that best define who I am as a person. In this article, I’d like to present some of these hindrances that I possess that I’ve become more comfortable with as I’ve grown through high school, and I’d like to discuss how they’ve affected me in high school.
If I had to guess, I’d say that one of the emotions that best defines who I am as a person is also one of the worst problems that I’ve had to deal with in my life thus far: anxiety. I’ve been very fortunate with my genetic makeup, but like everything else in the world, nothing can be perfect. I’ve struggled with anxiety issues ever since I was very young, and panic attacks are still fairly common in my day to day life. Fortunately, I’ve managed to cope with the stress of my anxiety much better as I’ve advanced through high school, and is no longer as big of an issue as it was in middle school.
In middle school, I would be anxious about every test, assignment, and every seemingly simple task I would need to complete for my classes to the point where I couldn’t get to sleep some nights depending on what awaited me the next day. My mom was always there trying to support me through it, and she’s one of the main reasons why I believe I’ve gotten better at managing my anxiety today.
Although this quality of mine was difficult to get over, it did have some positives that I can recall. One of these is the fact that my anxiety turned me into a perfectionist. Although my anxiety did make every assignment a nightmare to carefully wade through, it also gave me the extra push that I needed to bring my assignments, specifically my projects, to the next level. Now that I’m able to look back at the work that I accomplished early in middle school where my anxiety was the strongest, I’m proud of the work that I accomplished.
Anxiety isn’t the only main issue that I’ve confronted in high school. Another quality that I possess is somewhat of a blessing in my own eyes, but I’ve been told by others that this quality is something I need to change if I ever feel the desire to pursue better relationships with others. I’m confident that this quality most likely has a better name to explain it, but I’ve always called it simple “trust issues.”
To put it simply, I find it nearly impossible to trust other people knowing anything about me, unless they are immediate family members or very close friends. I couldn’t explain to you why this trait has been so prominent in my life. It’s just been there for awhile. Perhaps this trait is just an extension of my anxiety stemming from my social life and preventing me from forming more meaningful relationships. Who knows. Because of this, the line that distinguishes what a “friend” is compared to an “acquaintance” is drawn in a very precise way in my mind. Although this quality has probably averted several amazing relationships that would’ve been possible if I wasn’t so paranoid, it has also made the few true relationships that I’ve managed to have with other people shine brighter, allowing me to cherish them to a much deeper degree.
Like I said in the beginning, we all have issues, but it is important that we embrace them. By accepting our shortcomings, we can have the opportunity to lessen the effect they play in our lives, and we even have the opportunity to eliminate them outright if we work hard enough. The first step we have if we want to better ourselves is accepting that we aren’t perfect, and being willing to change our lives to make these traits easier to handle for ourselves and those around us. I’ll start working to handle mine. You should too.
